Brian and I have been married for 4 years….5 years on October 16, 2009! Like many married couples, the honeymoon is long over and after 4 years, 2 boys, Residency and a pretty hectic schedule, we decided that we had put our marriage on the back burner for too long. This weekend was much needed and long overdue. World Wide Marriage Encounter is a Catholic retreat that is open to anyone of any faith. The focus is on the couple and how to learn to communicate more effectively in order to draw you closer together. We started at 8pm on Friday and went until 4:30 pm on Sunday. The weekend was packed from 7:30am to 10pm and there was no time except for each other. What a great way to rekindle our relationship, put all of the outside worries and stresses aside and focus on our love and what brought us together many years ago! We learned a whole new way to communicate through dialogue (which is taught to you during the weekend) that really allowed us to open up and share our feelings. We weren’t sold on the concept or realized how it would help us going forward....even by Saturday evening. But the Holy Spirit did a lot of work on our hearts and we were changed by Sunday. Much to our surprise, we found out on Sunday that a couple had been praying for us all weekend, and we sure needed those prayers! We had mass on Saturday and Sunday, and confessions were offered both Friday and Saturday evening. Through the power of the sacraments of the Eucharist and Reconciliation, God gave us grace to open our hearts to really listen to Him. We both realized that God’s presence in our marriage was not always there and we vowed to make changes. One such change was to pray together every evening. This was very difficult for me because my time with God is very intimate and private. Opening myself to Brian in this manner was difficult and awkward, but the power of prayer together is undeniable. By the grace of God, we were able to completely forgive each other for all past wrongdoings and we were able to really open up to each other about some feelings that neither of us ever knew existed! By Sunday afternoon, we were excited and nervous about returning to the real world. Throughout the weekend, you get so caught up in each other and forget the pressures of the world. But the world hasn’t changed, only you as a couple have. As a result of the weekend, Brian and I have a new commitment to each other and putting our marriage before our children, families and friends and only behind God. I love my husband today more than I ever imagined I could. In a deeper way, I respect him, cherish him and will continue to honor him all the days of my life. We renewed our wedding vows at mass on Sunday and they meant so much more this time around. Our original wedding vows were “I, Jessica, take you, Brian, to be my husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.” Saying it again almost 5 years later was so rich and meaningful!
My prayer for everyone who reads this is that you explore this weekend retreat as an option for your marriage. If God is calling you to do it, then move forward with it and make the commitment for the weekend and the rest of your lives! I promise you that you will walk away changed and renewed in your marriage.
A week has passed since our weekend and we have stayed dedicated to communicating daily and putting our marriage first, which is challenging with two small children and a demanding trauma surgery service! As we journey through our last year in Temple, a year of fellowship and trying to discern where God wants us after that, our lives are going to be very exciting, challenging and full of memories. We have a renewed outlook on the next couple of years and know that no matter what, they will be great as long as we walk beside each other and hold each other up! My only regret in our marriage is that we didn’t do this weekend sooner! I am thankful to my parents for pushing us to do this and for flying down to Texas to watch the boys and support our marriage! Through support, prayer and the grace of God, our marriage has been changed for the better! I can’t even put a price tag on that! Thank you Mom and Dad….we love you!
