It is still surreal to me that my journey as a mother began over 4 years ago. Little did I know how much you three boys would change me, for the better. You have helped me immensely in my journey to be a better Catholic, more patient, compassionate, loving, strong, happy, creative and so much more. I set out on this journey with your father to help you become the best people possible; and somehow you have changed me along the way. I had no idea that I would ever be a stay at home mommy and yet I wouldn't trade the time with you for all the money in the world. My job is to help you come closer to Christ and develop a deep relationship with Him, and yet you have guided me closer to Christ. I am starting to realize that me changing was necessary to help you become the best version of yourself for Christ so that you can change the world. My father once told me that successful parenting is about caring, consistency and consequences.
1. Loving you is the easy part! I look at your sweet faces and can't help but love you more and more each day. My love for you comes so naturally and it is what keeps me going each day. My love for you allows me to laugh with you, be silly with you, comfort you when you are hurt, guide you in making good decisions, teaching you how to share and play with your brothers, rocking and cuddling when you just need some mommy time, and being there for you no matter what. It has taught me that through self-sacrifice, I can find my joy and happiness in yours. There is no better person in the world that can take care of you other than me. I truly believe that God picks each child for the parents. There are days that I wish I could send you to a pre-school so that I could get 2 hours to myself; whether to read or clean or just take a nap. But I know that you need me more than anything right now. You need my love and guidance and assurance that the world is a good place and all of your needs will be met; maybe not instantly, but they will be met. This neediness can be exhausting, but as with all things, this too shall pass. I don't want to ever have regrets that I wish I had more time with you. So I take each moment and I embrace it; I am thankful for each day and strive to get the most out of it; for your sake and for mine.
2. Consistency is tough and challenges me on a daily basis. I don't want to discipline you but I know that I must teach you right from wrong. When I am tired, being consistent is so difficult and yet I know that this consistency is what gives you a sense of calm and security. When I am consistent, you obey consistently because you know exactly what will happen if you do not. It is through consistency that a more peaceful home is achieved. Consistency takes a lot of work on my part; it means that I must put my needs and wants on hold if you are acting out and need to be redirected. This means that I may need to get off the phone during an important conversation or leave the park even though I want to stay and visit with other moms. It means that my needs must be put secondary to yours; this form of self-sacrifice is not always easy! But God always gives me the strength to persevere. He will never give me more than I can handle; my trust is in Him.
3. Consequences: this is my least favorite part of parenting. I know that I must give punishment when you have sinned. I must teach you how to obey God and that begins with obeying your parents at this point. I don't take pleasure in removing your privileges or sending you to time out. In fact, it is quite the opposite. It breaks my heart to watch you struggle, but I know that you must struggle in order to realize the importance of obeying. It is through these struggles that God gives us, the we are able to grow as a person and develop compassion for others. One of the greatest struggles in parenting, is coming up with creative punishments. I don't believe in just spanking or time-out. I think there is a time and place for both, but there are times when the loss of privileges can make more of an impact. I believe that before a consequence is given, parenting must be pro-active. It is through positive reinforcement that we can guide our children to obey with a happy heart, all the time. I must look for the positive and guide you to obey out of desire to please God, rather than to avoid punishment.
Someday, I hope to look back on my life and feel that my greatest accomplishments in my life were my marriage and my children. Your father and I have the opportunity to help you become faithful and obedient Catholics who can help to change the world. Through your love, you can share Christ's love with the world. You can make a difference and leave a piece of this world better than you found it. That is our dream for you boys! God has a plan for each of you, and as long as you obey Him, your happiness and salvation shall be achieved. This road in life is not easy, but we will always be here and love you, no matter how much you stumble. The love that your father and I have for you is infinite and never failing. We love you and will support you along this journey! I am so thankful that God gave each of you to us!
With love,
Mommy
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