Discerning the Voice of God

I came across this quote on another blog I was reading and felt it was too good not to share! What a powerful message and may we all have the strength to be beacons for Christ's lights to the world! This certainly spoke to me as we face a big move, new job, new city, new baby and leaving good friends. It is hard to accept what God asks us to do, but I pray I have the strength to do it all gracefully and with a grateful heart!

“When you face two options and each seems to please God, consider the one that displays God’s glory, power and strength. This makes room for God to reveal Himself to you and show Himself through you. God wants us to see the wondrous things He will accomplish in us. Don’t be fearful about the hard road He may ask you to take. Be encouraged and excited about seeing His divine, supernatural activity in and through you. God’s voice commands the option that will display His power. He desires to show Himself strong in you and will encourage you to do things that require trust and faith.”

by Priscilla Shirer, from her book Discerning the Voice of God

Texas Bluebonnets

His plan

While the last couple of months have been really busy, I have really struggled with the realization that our lives here in Temple are quickly coming to an end. We moved here almost 5 years ago on May 27, 2005. We had been married a mere 7 months and were still in the honeymoon phase and adjusting to life as newlyweds! Brian of course had just graduated from MD school and I had just graduated from University of Nebraska Medical Center with my Bachelor's in Radiation Science. I was excited about my new job in the OR at Scott & White and having a our first home to call our own, although at that time we didn't even own the door handle on the front door.

Then, the realization that we had both left the only lives we had never known began to sink in. I battled with situational depression for about 6 months and really struggled with living in Temple. I kept telling myself, "I can do this, it is only 5 years!". How my perspective has changed. In November of 2005, I saw Dr. Fothergill for the first time to have my annual exam and discuss getting pregnant. We went off the birth control the next month and for 7 months I struggled with my own body not wanting to cooperate and even ovulate. I watched as the few acquaintances I had got pregnant and I was left behind. Struggling for 7 months with fertility is not long compared to some, but it was enough to make me never take my own fertility for granted. My heart aches for women who wait each month for a baby and the struggles they go through to achieve pregnancy.

But I realize now that God had a plan in all of that. Because I didn't get pregnant, in May 2006 I applied for a job (a very LONG shot) at McLennan Community College as a Radiography Instructor. To my surprise, I got the job and started in August. In July, we went to the Dominican Republic and I guess a little R&R and maybe a tad bit of Rum & Coke was all we needed because Jacob was conceived in the Caribbean! I began Graduate School in the fall, naively thinking that I was going to be a career woman. Little did I know of God's Plan for me.

Jacob was born in April, I returned to work in June to finish out my contract for McLennan. That was the most difficult 9 weeks of my life, but it helped me to gain empathy for women who HAVE to work rather than choose to work. Working at McLennan Community College meant day hours (as opposed to the evening hours I worked at S&W - 3pm to 11pm) which gave me the opportunity to get involved in the Alliance and begin to really make some friends. Up until that point I had one friend from work and that was it. I had joined a bible study thru the Alliance that really helped push me in my Catholic faith and I met some amazing women! Once Jacob was born, I joined playgroups and it was easier to form my group of friends. These women are amazing and I have grown so much as a woman and mother because of them. Back in May 2005, I couldn't have possibly imagined the relationships I would have or how much I would grow as a person. Nor could I have even considered being a stay-at-home mom and finding contentment in that calling. I have not always done a good job of listening to God and trying to follow His plan rather than my own. This is something that I struggle with on a daily basis and especially now! I don't understand why God is asking us to leave Texas and this wonderful life we have here. I don't want to go. I love my friends, my house and the church community we belong to. I can't imagine a life without it and yet I have to put my faith in God, because I don't know what else to do! This morning I was reading my daily reflection and I came across this quick little prayer:

"Lord Jesus, look into my eyes and call my name. I want to be lifted up to embrace your perfect plan!"

I pray each day for the strength to embrace His plan and find peace in all of this. In the meantime, I will cherish each moment here in Texas and the time I have left with my friends, trying my hardest to make the most of it! I am thankful to God for the 5 years here in Texas that seemed so long at first and now the time has gone too fast. I have to believe that what is yet to come will continue to be a blessing. I will always hold Texas dear to my heart and who knows, maybe we will be back in a year?! I would like to say yes, but that is up to God!

Easter Sunday

The Texas Bluebonnet! What a beautiful symbol of spring and God's love for us all.

Jesus Christ is risen today! Alleluia!!!

We have so much to be grateful for, beginning with the sacrifice that was made on the cross for us by Jesus Christ. Good Friday this year was a very dismal day, threatening and overcast. It was most appropriate for how I envisioned the scene on Mt. Calvary, 2000 years ago. While we can meditate on the Stations of the Cross and pray for Jesus to have mercy on our souls, it is hard to truly grasp what our Saviour endured for us that day! But, three days later, his Resurrection is the fulfillment of all of the promises of our Father. How much he loved us!

As the boys are getting older, it is easier to incorporate more and more religious aspects of each Holiday. While the Easter Bunny is fun and exciting, the focus should always be on Christ. Friday evening, Jacob and I sat and when through the 14 Stations of the Cross. At the end of each cross, Jacob would save, "Lord Jesus, crucified. Have mercy on me." It was the sweetest sound to hear such an innocent and loving child recite this from memory. He couldn't possibly understand this Catholic faith that I teach him and yet he accepts it without challenge. If only our own faith could be that easy! It is truly amazing what our children can teach us!

Several weeks ago, we were sitting at the breakfast table and Jacob remarked "Mommy, I want to be just like Fr. Don when I get bigger" I nearly fell out of my chair because we never discuss this sort of thing, he has a LONG time before he needs to worry about what he will be when he grows up! I proceeded to ask him, "Why?" The response was amazing, he stated "Because I want to give out Body of Christ".

Somehow, I have imparted on him the significance of the Holy Eucharist and why receiving the body and blood of Christ is so precious. The graces we receive through the sacrament are what sustain our faith in order to live more Christ-like lives. It is not merely a symbol. It is the one time each day that Heaven meets Earth and we stand in the presence of Christ. It is the most humbling experience because none of us are worthy of being in His presence! Believing in the Eucharist has never been easy for me and something that requires a great deal of faith in the Jesus, the Gospel and in the Early Church Fathers of the Catholic Church. This is the one Sacrament that I truly wish all non-Catholics could experience, it is the most life-giving action that we participate in as Catholics! Thank you Jesus for giving us the Eucharist that we may have the strength to spread your Word!

A few pics I took on Easter!

The boys at church...I am bias, but they were the most handsome little boys I have ever seen!

What, isn't the Easter basket supposed to go on your head?

Mom...how many more pictures do we have to take? Why haven't you realized that we will never both look at the camera and smile angelically like you SO desperately want us to?

Ok, fine. We will smile and laugh but Mom..you kind of look goofy! ;-)

My three handsome men! I am most proud of how much I paid for those outfits for the boys! I got Jacob's outfit at JCPenny's 60% off ($13.97). Caleb's was 80% off ($6.97) but missing the pants so I picked up a pair on sale at Dillards for $7.97. Not too bad considering I did it all the Thursday before! The ties are my favorite part, it makes them look so grown up!